


I'd put up with endless misery, if it meant I could have you...

by Stone_Heart



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Acceptance, Confessions, Declarations Of Love, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Feels, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Marriage, POV Otabek Altin, Protective Otabek Altin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-17
Updated: 2017-11-17
Packaged: 2019-02-03 13:57:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12749709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stone_Heart/pseuds/Stone_Heart
Summary: “I knew I’d put up with endless misery if it meant I could be with him.” He says, chest aching. “He’s my world, and it’s terrifying. And it scared me- because at any moment my world could end.”Otabek wanted it all. The ugly parts, and the beautiful. All his rough edges and sharpness. His softness; the way his eyes with melt in the mornings before his routine coffee, his giggly laugh when he pressed his cold feet into Otabek’s back, his twisted smile. The fact that he always had a place to rest, to be himself to the fullest capacity.The ring box is heavy in his winter coat, and he doesn’t doubt the weight of it for a second.





	I'd put up with endless misery, if it meant I could have you...

His heart is beating days before he has the courage to climb those steps. It feels like a daunting task, to climb the three short stairs to knock on the door. The small container is heavy in his winter coat, and he doesn’t doubt the weight of it for a second.

Lifting his hand to knock, he gives himself a moment. The house waits, patient as he gathers himself up. When he knocks, he does so with a firm hand. It echoes, and his heart strains in his chest.

“Hi,” he mumbles, a hand behind his head. It’s awkward, stilted in his head, even as he knows his voice comes out normal. It’s okay to breath, so he takes in a breath, and relaxes his shoulders.

Nikolai smiles, eyes warm like molten silver.

“Hello Otabek,” he says, and opens up the door, even as he looks confused. “I thought you had practice.”

“Not today.” That’s a lie. Yakov spoke to his coach earlier; explained everything in that way of his. He pulls his coat off, the press of the container no longer against his side. Otabek puts it out of mind, and rubs his cold fingers together.

“Yuri isn’t here. Would you like tea? I have that Japanese stuff if you’re willing to drink it.” Nikolai’s already pulling out mugs, and he couldn’t imagine not allowing the man to make him a cup of tea.

“Just normal tea.” He says, and Nikolai ushers him to the couches. The fireplace is roaring, an assortment of faded red rugs along with a few books clutter the space. Otabek sighs. It’s the scent of home. Old books and rugs, the earthy smell of wood and soot. He decides that he likes it, even without Yuri here to fill the silence.

“Settle, the tea’ll be ready in a second.” He brings it over only a moment later, and pours too much milk in his mug. He stirs in a spoonful of jam, and closes his eyes as he sips. Otabek drinks, tipping back the mug. The tea is hot enough to burn, enough to centre him.

“So,” says Nikolai, slapping his knee. He adjusts his reading glasses, and grins. “What brings you here?”

Otabek takes another sip before speaking. “Sir, I’ve have something I need to ask you. I… want you to give me your honest opinion.”

He laces his fingers together, frowning. Otabek can see where Yuri’s frown comes from. It’s the same, more lined, yes, but so starkly similar.

It’s difficult to frame it. The question, that specific question; it seems off to throw it out there. He watches the man, and starts to speak.

“Before Yuri- I never really understood love.” He says, shortly. Nikolai doesn’t say anything, still settled comfortably in his arm chair. He opens his mouth, struggling with the words for a moment, then closing. Swallowing the lump in his throat. “All those songs- movies- I never knew what it was like. To have my heart feel so full it was like I was about to explode.”

Shyly, he looks up at the old man in his chair. His eyes had softened, the creases of his face peaceful in the gentle light of the fire.

“I was six? Maybe seven, and decided I’d never fall in love. My parents… they just fell to pieces, and I couldn’t understand why anyone would put themselves through so much suffering. I watched them break along with it all.” Looking up, he doesn’t see a shred of sympathy. It’s- empathy? Understanding in those molten eyes of his- and his heart aches.

“But then I meet Yuri.” When they first met he could barely get a word out without clamping up. The proximity was too much. Yuri was intense, unbelievably so. Sometimes he could barely look at the boy, all blond hair and teen angst. Relaxing around him was like trying to relax in a burning building. He was always afraid of being burnt if he touched the edges or stared too long at the fire. He couldn’t _breath_ \- it would kill him if he tried.

It took far too long for him to realise it was a ruse. The flames were cardboard cut outs, and it was safe to touch the walls. Yuri let down his guard, allowed him to simmer down to a gentle hiss.

They didn’t always understand each other. They fought sometimes- over stupid _stupid_ things. Their fights were terrible. But at the end of the day, when all was said and done, they had a home to go back to, a blanket to snuggle under, and a warm _somebody_ to hold.

Otabek wanted it all. The ugly parts, and the beautiful. All his rough edges and sharpness. His softness; the way his eyes with melt in the mornings before his routine coffee, his giggly laugh when he pressed his cold feet into Otabek’s back, his twisted smile. The fact that he always had a place to rest, to be himself to the fullest capacity.

His hands twisted together. “And I knew I’d put up with endless misery if it meant I could be with him.” He says, chest aching. “He’s my world, and it’s terrifying. And it scared me- because at any moment my world could end.” Squeezing his fingers, he looked back up at the man, determined. “Loving someone that much- you can see the dangers. You are suddenly aware of all the horrible things that could happen.” He’s shaking, right there, and Nikolai just keeps looking at him with melting eyes.

The world starts to spin, and he stares the man straight in the eye.

“I want to marry your grandson,” he says, shoulders trembling. “I have to stand by him. I love Yuri, more than I could put into words.”

Nikolai took in a breath, hands firmly on his knees. “Otabek, are you asking me for my blessing?”

He nodded, determined. “I am. I have no idea what it’s like- you’ve had to raise him alone. I can’t imagine-“ The man removed his reading glasses, placing them beside his mug. Otabek can’t read his eyes; his vision feels blurry. “I promise Sir, there is nothing I’d love more than to cherish him. For as long as he’d have me.”

The old man shudders, swiping at his eyes. A grin splits across his face, proud from ear to ear. “You never even had to ask!” He laughs, choked with unshed tears. “You already have it.”

With those words, Otabek finally allows the tears to fall, and they embrace. Tears roll over shoulders,  grins mirrored in their expressions, and the house around them suddenly feels like home.

**Author's Note:**

> This is very inspired by an Australian gay marriage ad. This one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f8fi6oSKo7s.
> 
>  
> 
> Watch it, but get the tissues! Good on you Australians for the overwheming yes vote! Thank you for showing your fellow lgbt+ family and friends that they are deserving of the same rights as straight citizens. I'm very happy with this result, and I was tearing up throughout the last couple days seeing all the wonderful reactions!
> 
> Until next time!


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